The Banff Sandbox Premiere

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10/5/07
By: Andrew Hardingham

Wile a normal sibling fight might end in a torn shirt exposing a supple milky white bosom and the hope of an accidental French kiss, all the Sandbox premiere had to offer in that department were the Walton brothers having a fight and getting arrested. Wile now on house arrest and awaiting his court hearing, another good friend Mike Suderman was on hand for some good entertainment as he tried to fight the Banff police. Yes, they piss you off but no you can’t win. It’s a logic I live by when the cop show arrives, unfortunately that was something Suderman forgot all about.

A few highlights of the night were the Ride board give away. Every year at the premiere I try to see some boobs. After last year's Flavor country premiere I gave up and deemed Canadian woman frigid. But this year while announcing, “showing your boobs won’t get you shit,” all of a sudden boobs were everywhere. I was like “SH*T this is great!” When I announced the board giveaway there were boobs all over the place so I opted for a better way to give the board to some one who actually disserved it. I announced, “Who ever can take 5 belt lashings gets the board." One brave man stepped up and took his shirt off for the punishment. We had to tell him to get the hell off stage because another guy offered to take 10 whips. It was great! They were some of the hardest hits I’ve seen so we gave the poor guy the board after proving that there still are hardcore snowboarders out there who don’t get there parents to buy them all their gear. F**k yah dude, you rule!

Plenty of honey and a sh*t load of booze made for a great party that has proven legendary in the Bow valley. The dice rolled heavy and people who used to use me as a bank machine got f**ked out of a sh*tload of their paychecks so thanks for bringing your Z game and paying my rent.

Thanks to Jordan and all the people at the Aurora for tolerating us and hope to see you next year.

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