2004 DTR - Kicking Horse Mountain Resort, Golden, B.C.

OK, OK, as you may know we partied in Whistler. The four days we spent there felt like four years. We collectively decided to take a couple days off and clean up down in Vancouver before moving on to one of our most anticipated stops of the tour. The only thing more painful than our detoxification had to be the itch to get back on our boards. I had a notion that Kicking Horse would put us back in our element.

The Horse, as it's known, is one of those places you don't want to tell anyone about. The reason I say this is because this place is so damn good. I should just tell you it's beat, in fact, that's what I'm going to do. First off, the mountain is flat. With hardly any vertical rise I found it hard to keep speed down the mellow groomers that make up the majority of the hill. The other thing would be the complete lack of snow; we spent most of our time praying to God our edges would hold on the blue ice. What else? Oh yeah, everyone there is mean, all of the lifts are slow, it's only open for one month out of the year, and lift tickets cost 200 dollars. As if this wasn't enough to totally ruin our trip, the locals we meet seemed cool enough yet they couldn't ride for shit. Justin Baun, Ave Perry, and Colin Punter tried to show us around the area but I could tell they had no clue of what they were doing. I would have felt better having some kid on sled doggz take us through a mogul field. These guys were still in the Dark Ages. Man, we're talking 144 twin tips, baseless bindings with no backs; it was all tailfish and mutebones. I was either helping them strap in or waiting at the bottom. After numerous attempts trying to explain the difference between regular and goofy foot, I gave up.

Having said that, I knew the kids here needed some help, big time. I swear, hooking up the kids that showed up today had to be as much fun as anything we've done all tour. I suppose here in the B.C. interior the children aren't afforded the luxuries that so many of you little rats take for granted. When I saw one pup with socks taped to his hands I knew something was up. If a good coating of Scotch Guard on your paws is considered your spring gloves that qualifies as dedication. As ambassadors of the greatest snowboarding publication known to man and proud representatives of the sponsors that support us, today we dug deep into our resources in an attempt to bring light to the shadows. We gave away sooo much stuff. If Drop Gloves only knew that little Johnny won't lose yet another finger because of their fine product, they would be proud. And if a belt by 686 Enterprises can stop at least one case of ass-rash, then it's my duty to make that happen. Suppose the new Volcom DVD inspires one young child to take up snowboarding instead of skiing, yes that is what I'm talking about. It's thoughts like these that give me the strength to keep going. Snowboarding rules and these kids know it.

SNOWBOARDER MAGAZINE'S BEST OF KICKING HORSE 1. Best Freeriding 2. Best Cafeteria

P.S. I should tell you how rad this place is, but I won't. I should tell you about our best lines all trip, but I won't. I should also tell you how the locals punish that mountain, but I won't. These are some of the things that can only be experienced firsthand. With that in mind, do whatever is necessary to visit Kicking Horse. Get on it!